11.10.09

So a few days ago i officially broke up with my girlfriend Teresa. Though... I did explained to her everything and I had put all the blame upon myself and I felt I could not make her happy any longer than she had felt. Somehow the conversation ended up as an argument again and i'm being blamed for not putting enough effort, sacrificial, and showing that I don't love her. Which I kinda pissed me off because one, I was willing to leave all my freinds behind and make her happy. I offered that five times to her and all five time she didn't want to because i'll be "lonely" and i'm like... "but i'll have you and that's all I need..." So yeah... two is that i've always ranted to people and showed them how much I loved her but I needed help with my situation when I clearly tried every single way of figuring out what to do with her and to make her happy. Third, I have freinds, family, her, and school to take care of. All she has is me and school. She believe that her family doesn't care about her. Which I dont believe is true because she neglects them and not have dinners with them and hang out with them. So iono that kinda pissed me off. Anyways there are also more things to talk about but I do not want to get into. Talking about this pisses me off but I don't know... I need to express my anger of a failure life I have. Why is it that everytime I want to care for someone very much I end up hurting them. None of them see how hard I try and I try multitasking to everything I can. I hate ignorance... sigh. FML

On the positive side, i'm single harharharhar. So... i guess i kinda feel more relaxed like the weight is a lot less than before so yeah haha. Also, i've been hearing some stuff in audi about the fam Excelsior being labeled the same thing as biohazard, prestige, etc etc about being fb whores... One thing, we dont plan on stealing fp. 2nd thing, we play fb to have fun and have our other opponents to have fun as well or so that's the goal point. 3rd thing, we fb fairly as much as possible though im starting to realize my fam's been getting carried away taking away over 20+ fp which I need to talk to them about. In any case, it seems like most of the fam i know dislike losing a lot of fam so I'm already trying to have my fam miss cfm and fm on purpose so that the gap wouldn't be so huge.

8:57 AM